Secondary Characters

Steve Holt!

Steve Holt (Justin Grant Wade) is a senior (taking the year for the third time) and football star at the high school George Michael and Maeby attend, who often shouts his name, “Steve Holt!”, while pumping his fists in the air.

Described as a “moron jock” by George Michael and “basically a young GOB” by Michael, Steve Holt portrays Beatrice in the school’s production of Much Ado About Nothing, dates Lindsay (after Maeby convinces him that Lindsay is a transsexual), and is student body president for four years (he declines a fifth term in order to concentrate on finding his real father). His campaign posters often read “Volt for Steve Holt.” The crowd at his re-election rally can be heard chanting “Four more years.”

In the Season 2 episode The Immaculate Election, it is revealed that Steve Holt is the illegitimate son of Gob and Eve Holt, the product of one of Gob’s many one-night stands in high school. Before realizing that she is supposedly a blood-relation, Steve has a brief relationship with his cousin, Maeby, which results in his being given a roofie to avoid any kind of intimacy. After learning of his parentage, he bonds with both his father and “Uncle Mike”. He has worked as a gift-basket delivery-boy, a Bluth Banana Stand employee, and cameraman for his father’s magic act.

Ann Veal

Ann Paul Veal is the on-again/off-again girlfriend of George Michael Bluth, even though their relationship is little more than his means of distracting himself from Maeby. Her first appearance was in the episode Let ‘Em Eat Cake, where she was played by Alessandra Torresani. In every subsequent appearance, she has been portrayed by Mae Whitman.

She comes from an extremely religious family, and her father (played by Alan Tudyk) is a pastor.Ann and her mother are often mistaken to be sisters. In Meat the Veals, Ann’s mother (played by Ione Skye) kisses Michael, which she believes to be making love to him. The kiss leads to a brawl between Michael and her husband at the end of the episode.

None of the Bluths with the exception of George Michael can remember Ann’s name. In the Year Book she is listed as “Not Pictured” under her photograph, although they did print a retraction in the spring supplement. Michael refers to her variously (and always accidentally) as “Bland,” “Egg,” “Annabel,” “Yam,” “Plant,” “Plain,” and “Ann Hog.” He once abandons her in Mexico accidentally. Maeby takes pleasure in referring to Ann as “Bland”. George Michael tells Maeby that Ann is “not bland” when forced to defend his love interest.

Ann is attracted to George Michael’s Star Wars kid-like lightsaber demonstration, which led to their reconciliation after a breakup midway through the second season. George Michael wanted to get pre-engaged to Ann at the end of the second season, lost his resolve at the last moment, and was then asked by Ann to teach her his secular ways.

Ann’s strict conservatism serves as a foil for Maeby’s commitment to rebellion. Ann leads the protest at Maeby’s premiere of the English remake of Dangerous Cousins, originally a French movie about a sexual relationship between two cousins.

Ann moved on from George Michael after coming in third place in an “Inner Beauty” pageant. Gob, who admitted a penchant for third place pageant winners, later revealed that he was dating a Christian girl, who eventually turned out to be Ann

Oscar

Oscar can be distinguished from the balding George by his flowing “lion’s mane” hair, due to lack of stress in his life. He is a frequent user of marijuana. He served as a “croc spotter” on a swift boat in the Vietnam War (yelling out “Croc!” whenever he saw a crocodile), and once wrote a song for David Cassidy, “All You Need Are Smiles”, that made Joan Baez call him “the shallowest man in the world.” After numerous hints, in Season 2 it is revealed that he is Buster’s father.

Oscar resides most often in a trailer outside Camp Pendleton. He owns about 200 acres (81 ha) of lemon groves and sells lemonade to the troops when their maneuvers pass by. He sells the land to Michael, who is unaware that the government has an easement on it so they can drive their tanks through it. Lucille takes advantage of Oscar’s feelings for her and convinces him to buy the land back.

According to Michael, Oscar has lived on handouts all his life. According to his brother, he has never had to work for a living, leading to his full head of shoulder-length hair that Lucille finds irresistible. Oscar’s persistence with Lucille - whom he met when she was working a USO tour - leads to a rekindling of their once torrid romance. This disturbs Buster, who discovers the adulterous pair in flagrante delicto multiple times.

After George Sr. escapes confinement, Oscar is arrested because police assume he is George. The police also impound Oscar’s trailer, leaving him even more indigent than usual. Lucille allows him to live with her and Buster. Oscar’s presence allows Buster to develop the many talents he’d discovered with Lucille. He lovingly brushes Oscar’s hair, a ritual once reserved for Lucille. In return, Buster is treated to several uncomfortable silences upon witnessing Oscar’s penchant for living loose and literally, “letting it all hang out.”

Oscar’s shameless exhibitionism is a product of the proximity he shares with his dream woman. Once confined to a single residence, the illicit pair revive the past.

In the second season finale, to clear up his legal difficulties and punish his brother for cuckolding him, George Sr. shaves Oscar’s head and turns him in. The stress of being imprisoned and mistaken for George Sr. causes Oscar’s hair to not grow back. This, paired with the fact that his fingerprints have been burned off by the family Cornballer, prevents him from establishing his identity.

To convince the world of his true identity, Oscar sets up www.imoscar.com, a blog of sorts that details his life in prison while continually asserting that he is Oscar. A real-life version of the site was maintained by Fox Broadcasting until mid-2006 .

In the third season, Oscar manages to get out of prison when George Sr. is placed under house arrest and leaves town. He returns occasionally, but these visits are usually ended when George Sr. knocks him out and switches places so he can escape again. In the series finale, George invites Oscar to the Bluth Company function to unwittingly take his place, a fact Oscar learns as soon as Lucille refers to him as George (“Oh God Oscar! When are you going to learn there’s no such thing as free shrimp!”).

Lucille Austero (Liza Minnelli), often referred to as “Lucille Two”, is the friend, neighbor, and chief social rival of Lucille Bluth.

Lucille Austero lives across the hall from Lucille and Buster Bluth in the Balboa Towers. In Season 1, she and Buster end up dating after an incident at a country club auction when Buster bids on the wrong Lucille. Their relationship is looked down upon by the other Bluths. Her chronic case of vertigo often causes some difficulty for the klutzy Buster.

In Season 2, she becomes the majority shareholder of the Bluth company after the family members sell their shares. To ensure the company’s safety, Gob romances Lucille, who in turn names Gob the president of the Bluth Company in place of Michael. Although continuously stating that he is disgusted by her, it is seen in various clips that he is in fact infatuated with Lucille 2. Buster at the time is dating Starla, the Bluth Company receptionist. After learning his older brother is dating his ex-girlfriend, Buster leaves Starla to pursue Lucille. Eventually, Lucille leaves both of them for Stan Sitwell.

Kitty Sanchez

Kitty Sanchez (Judy Greer) is George Bluth Sr.’s fiercely loyal and independent assistant. 

Kitty maintained a long term affair with George Sr. and a fevered yet brief liaison with GOB, despite the fact he is disgusted by her. After George Sr. was imprisoned, Kitty stayed on to work for Michael.

Despite her intense loyalty to George Sr., she did not demonstrate the same toward Michael. Michael finally got fed up and fired her, but Kitty and Michael’s father both insisted he didn’t have that power, the latter of whom insisting, upon Michael’s observation on her sanity, that, “You don’t fire crazy.” Michael attempted to rehire Kitty, but her obstinacy forced him to immediately fire her again. Kitty subsequently vanished with potentially damaging information, considering her sexual history with her boss. In actuality, she did not disappear, but was working with the police in an effort to gain control of the Bluth company. After arranging a meeting with Michael, she inadvertently admitted that she had proof that George Sr. had built homes overseas without paying taxes. Michael downplayed the importance of the revelation and Kitty dropped out of sight.

Kitty re-emerged in Let ‘Em Eat Cake to rescue George Sr. from the hospital. They escaped to Mexico together but were separated again when he was pronounced dead. Kitty caught up with him in Spring Breakout and blackmailed him into staying with her, and giving her the son he had promised her (prompting George, Sr. to comment, “Never promise crazy a baby”). Michael and Gob managed to rescue their father while Lucille had a showdown with her rival. The Bluth matriarch put her years of alcohol abuse to good use by besting Kitty in a drinking contest. Seemingly defeated, the hung over mistress returned to her hotel room to discover the Bluths had inadvertently left behind the ransom she’d been asking for: 250cc’s of “George Sr.” in a cooler.

Kitty returned later, claiming she had reformed, gotten into AA, and even has a famous sponsor. She won’t say who it is, but she drops some pretty obvious hints of it being an ex-Night Court star; (“It’s not Bull. It’s not Harry Anderson. And he’s white.”), a reference to actor John Larroquette as show creator Mitchell Hurwitz was once a writer for The John Larroquette Show, and Larroquette himself is a recovering alcoholic. At the end of Season 2 she and Tobias, the state of his marriage still up in the air, had jetted off to Reno, Nevada so he could pursue a plum spot in the Blue Man Group. As we learn in Season 3, the part has already been taken by George Bluth who then proceeds to steal Kitty from his son-in-law as well. A final reference to Kitty is made when Tobias masquerades as her in an effort to win back Lindsay’s affection.

The one constant in meetings between Michael and Kitty is that she reveals her breasts to him, usually with the comment, “Take a good look, ‘cuz it’s the last time you’re gonna see these” or “say goodbye to these, Michael.” Michael’s reaction tends to be one of vague horror.

Barry Zuckercorn

Barry Zuckerkorn (Henry Winkler) is the sluggish attorney for the Bluth family.

Zuckerkorn represents George Sr., the family patriarch, who has been arrested and charged with defrauding investors, and light treason (George Bluth Sr., had built homes in Iraq with Saddam Hussein.) Zuckerkorn often appears languid and distracted in his handling of the case. He does not seem particularly adept in the courtroom and multiple references have been made to him being a bad lawyer. For years, he took credit for getting Michael out of his marriage before Michael reminded him that his wife died. He also believed that a husband and wife cannot be arrested for the same crime, which led George Sr. to put Lucille in charge of the Bluth Company when George Sr. thought the SEC was coming for him. Despite his incompetence, an advertisement on a bench for his services reads “He’s very good”, which was a quote Lucille Bluth had previously said.

He is inevitably ill-prepared, which he usually blames on long meetings the night before. In fact, most of his nights are spent hanging out at rest stops, a behavior that is frequently mentioned and accompanied by a fast cut to an establishing shot of a dark, shady rest-stop facility.

His sexual leanings are ambiguous although it appears that he may prefer the company of male transvestite hookers and may be a tranny chaser; it is possible that he is outwardly homophobic (often making mildly negative references and comments about “the homosexuals” and then regretting his comments) while secretly homosexual. Like Tobias Fünke, Barry makes many colorful references that seem to allude to his exclusive attraction to men. They aren’t explicit enough, however, to be conclusive. He has been with the Bluths for a long time and was kept only because Lucille considers him to be “part of the family.” His reputation is stronger with the elder Bluths than with the children.

Despite his parents’ dependence on Barry, Michael Bluth fired him on the first episode of the third season, which ended his law career, as the Bluths were his only clients. Since then, he has been acting as a transvestite prostitute, and Lindsay seeing her husband Tobias retaining Barry’s “services” has prompted her to seek a divorce. Zuckerkorn was replaced as the Bluths’ attorney by Bob Loblaw. He was never seen again.

Annyong

Hel-loh ”Annyong” Bluth (Justin Lee) is the adopted Korean son of Lucille and George Sr.

“Hel-loh” claims his name is the Korean word for “One day”, a name given to him by his grandfather, whose idea for a frozen banana cart was stolen by George Sr. and used as inspiration for the banana stand that launched the Bluth empire; his grandfather vowed to one day get even for his stolen banana stand and ensuing deportation. Lucille adopts him midway through the first season. Apparently knowing no English, the youth greets his adoptive family by saying “annyong”, the Korean word for “hello”. When they repeat the word, so does he. This causes Lucille to assume his name is “Annyong”. Annyong becomes an articulate member of the household who often finds himself in disagreement with Buster. He also develops a crush on Maeby in the season one finale after she kisses him to make George Michael jealous. He is apparently sent to the Milford School by Lucille, who is attempting to teach him a lesson (though she forgets what). Annyong is found to be hiding in the walls of Lucille’s apartment. In the third season finale it is revealed that Hel-loh (who finally reveals his name after his usual greeting of “Annyong”, prompting ironic confusion among the Bluths) orchestrated the second U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission (SEC) raid on the family as revenge for himself and his grandfather.

At the end of the episode Motherboy XXX, an Asian actor cast to play Annyong in the Scandalmakers’ documentary passes by Lindsay as she visits an actor’s trailer.

“Hel-loh”, means a single day in the Korean language. The pronunciation of the Korean word in the English language can be twisted slightly to sound like “hello.”

Bob Loblaw

Bob Loblaw (Scott Baio) is the new family attorney, replacing Barry Zuckerkorn.

Bob Loblaw first appears in the third episode of Season 3, claiming this isn’t the first time he’s been brought in to replace Barry, and that he can do anything Barry can do, plus skew younger, alluding to Baio’s experience replacing Henry Winkler (Zuckerkorn) on the 1970s sitcom Happy Days. Contrasting Zuckerkorn’s incompetence, Loblaw is a no-nonsense attorney who is always in the company of his stenographer, who records all of his meetings.

He advertises his services with slogans such as “Why should you go to jail for a crime someone else noticed?” and “You don’t need double talk; you need Bob Loblaw.” As is evidenced by this, his name is meant to sound like “blah-blah-blah”. Underneath his commercial advertisement is the phrase “Bob Loblaw No Habla Español”.

Adding to the tongue twister-like aspect of the character’s name, the third season episode S.O.B.s includes a newspaper headline that reads “Bob Loblaw Lobs Law Bomb” and later in the season “Bob Loblaw Launches Law Blog” (viz. The Bob Loblaw Law Blog).

He has a daughter named Hope.

Gene Parmesan

Gene Parmesan (Martin Mull) is a mediocre private detective and master of quick-change occasionally hired by Lucille Bluth. She hires him to find George Sr. in the second season episode, ¡Amigos!. Parmesan always reports to Lucille by approaching her in a disguise and then dramatically revealing himself; Lucille invariably screams in delight every time. He is said in the narration, however, to be “far from the best.”

The episode Out on a Limb has Michael talking briefly to Gene on his cellphone, having hired him to investigate Maggie.

Maggie Lizer

Maggie Lizer (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) is considered to be the most feared prosecuting attorney in all of Orange County.

Michael Bluth meets Maggie in a bar. When she introduces herself, she says her name is Maggie Lizer, as in Maggie Lies-her ass off. After she mistakes Michael for an attorney, he says his name is Chareth Cutestory and that he practices maritime law, a reference to a role as a lawyer that Michael held in a school musical,The Trial of Captain Hook. Maggie and Michael return to her home after drinking at the bar. He spends the night and wakes up perplexed as how to proceed. When he realizes she is blind, Michael decides to continue seeing her out of guilt.

Maggie is prosecuting the government’s case against the Bluths; Maggie knew who Michael was but chose not to reveal this. Instead she gave him what she described as “a summary of everything the government has against the Bluths so far”, which was actually a wish list, in an attempt to manipulate him. Michael continues seeing her despite the conflict of interest, until he learns that she is not blind, but had used this as a manipulation technique to pass her law school exams and gain sympathy during trials. As a result of the deception, Maggie is taken off the case. Her guide dog, “Justice,” is revealed to be actually blind.

Maggie returns for two episodes in season 2, eight and a half months pregnant—eight and a half months after her relationship with Michael. She later admits the child is not Michael’s, having volunteered to be a surrogate for two homosexual police officers - though this also turns out to be a deception, as she “outsourced” the pregnancy to a client who was suing a restaurant for making her fat. Realizing that the two of them cannot be in a relationship as they crave complications in their lives, they decide to part ways after a final fling. Ironically, a throwaway gag at the end of the episode reveals Maggie became pregnant as a result.

J. Walter Weatherman

J. Walter Weatherman (Steve Ryan) is a one-armed man used by George Bluth to frighten his children into good behavior.

Weatherman, a former employee of George Sr.’s who lost his arm in a Bluth Company construction accident, is recruited by George Sr. to fake accidents and appear to have lost his arm as a result of the Bluth children’s misbehavior. The lesson ends with J. Walter turning to the children and saying “and that’s why you don’t…” do whatever action George Sr. is trying to stop, such as not leaving notes and yelling. When Michael asks his father for him to teach George Michael a lesson, his father tells him that he “killed him when he left the door open with the air conditioner on.” (a reference to an unseen ‘lesson’) Though this is shown to be untrue when George Sr. hires him back to teach Michael a lesson about teaching his son lessons. Buster later uses the same trick on both Michael and George Sr. as well as Gob, using his fake hand, to teach them a lesson about not using amputees to teach lessons.

Jack Dorso

Also know as “Uncle Jack,” or “Fake Uncle Jack,” a friend of George Sr.’s father, first achieved success in the 1940s while appearing in the radio and film serial Red McGibbon and Bullet: Nazi Hunters. The actor who played Red McGibbon was eventually arrested for his Communist sympathies, and Jack made one failed attempt at going solo as Bullet. After that, he opened a series of gyms, an idea that he stole from Red during a prison visit. Jack annually performed feats of strength on his birthday, but lost the use of his legs on his 70th birthday when he tried to squat 350 pounds. George Sr. warns Michael that Jack always wants something in return for a favor, and tells him to ask Lucille if she’d be willing to “take another bullet for the family”.

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